by Jon Mercer –
Five Self Esteem Tips
1. Every individual has both strengths and weaknesses. While most of us feel very good about our strengths, we usually have negative feelings about our perceived weaknesses. But one of the best self esteem tips is to practice complete acceptance of both your strengths AND your weaknesses.
It’s easy for us to feel confident about areas of life that come easily to us. But a sign of real self esteem in a person is when they are comfortable with their limitations and weaknesses too. Become comfortable with your weaknesses, and learn to practice acceptance. After all, your weaknesses are part of you too, and they deserve the same respect as your strengths.2. Practice positivity as a way of life. Most of us go through our day on “autopilot” to a great extent. Unfortunately, if your autopilot is thinking in a negative or self-critical way, over time this can have a damaging effect on your self esteem and confidence. And all the self esteem tips in the world can’t really help you if you’re constantly reinforcing bad “thinking habits” by thinking negatively.
The solution is to practice being an unashamedly positive person. Look for the silver lining in every situation. This is not being a Pollyanna; but rather, it is retraining your mind to look for the best in yourself and in other people. Over time, a positive mental outlook always produces greater self esteem and feelings of self-worth.
3. Build yourself “up” instead of putting yourself “down.” Everyone has an inner voice, and some of our inner voices tend to constantly criticize our every thought, behavior and attribute. You wouldn’t put up with a friend or acquaintance who constantly criticized you this way, so why put up with an inner voice that does the same thing?
Here are a few examples of the type of questions I’m talking about:
- “Why am I so resourceful and confident?”
- “Why do I feel so good about me?”
- “What are my best qualities?”The idea is to slowly repeat these questions to yourself. You don’t have to worry about the answers (your subconscious will find them for you). Just repeat the questions in a relaxed manner for a minute or two. If you like, you can close your eyes and meditate on the questions while you do this exercise.
4. Be comfortable with both success and failure. Most of us hate to fail; in fact, one of the most common reasons for self esteem problems is feeling like a “failure” because of some situation in the past that did not go well. But failure is a part of life — it is something that happens to all of us sometimes and nothing that should shake your self esteem.
Many great business leaders, for example, have been fired from important jobs, and had several companies and products that were failures before they hit it big. Failure is something we should learn from, but not something that should ruin our self esteem. That’s why being comfortable with both success and failure is such an important self esteem tip.
5. Be realistic with your goals. There are very few self esteem tips as important as setting realistic goals, so that you climb the ladder of success one rung at a time. Trying to bite off more than you can chew in any endeavor is a surefire way to lose self esteem in yourself and your abilities.
Creating real self esteem in your life is a matter of establishing a pattern of success. You can start very small, with little victories. Then, proceed to build on your smaller victories in order to create more and more success. In this manner, self esteem builds one step at a time, and you have a firm foundation of successful action to build upon.
Practice your “loaded questions” daily, set realistic goals and practice self-acceptance of both your strengths and weaknesses on a daily basis. Following all of these simple self esteem tips will lead to positive changes very quickly.