For some the idea of surrender is a difficult one – it conjures up images of loss of control,giving authority over to someone else, forgoing pleasure, or even giving up responsibility for living a purposeful life. Surrender is a word we associate with the battlefield, of “crying Uncle” in a wrestling match, or of allowing a bully to take control.
The reality of soulful surrender, however, has little to do with these violent images. Soulful surrender is about entering a state of grace – of living in harmony and attunement with the qualities of our higher Self. It is one of recognizing where the human ego creates fears and limiting beliefs about who we are, and deciding nonetheless to speak and live from a deeper, at times mysterious, truth.
Certain beliefs tend to block our willingness to surrender on the soul level: We conjure up images of a divine puppeteer who decides our fate irrespective of our wishes; others maintain that it is unsafe to let go of ego-control; others assert that life events are the result of “chance, fate or coincidence”; and still others find it hard to conceive of the notion that we are all connected at a spiritual level.
In many ways it is not a surprise that we are afraid of losing our individual sense of control. We spend much of our life trying to build a strong sense of self. In fact, it is a necessary stage of our soul journey to develop a sense of confidence and self-esteem in relation to the world. The ego helps us to have influence, direction and control in a world that believes in the separated self.
The ego’s main illusion is that we are separate independent beings, both from each other and from Spirit. This belief supports the evolutionary idea of survival of the fittest and the need for hierarchy and power over others. For a time the more we accumulate and the more power we assume gives a sense of greater security.
The ego’s main purpose is to survive and it does so by nurturing attachments to possessions, personal beliefs and relationships. All loss (even the loss of an idea or belief) is seen as a threat to survival of the ego. From the ego’s perspective, competition and self-interest are absolutely necessary to maintain survival.
However, as one matures along a soul centred path we start to see that attachment to the individual ego’s needs creates increasing dissatisfaction. The satisfaction of accomplishment/power and material accumulation is at best temporary – there is a continual threat of someone else’s ego who also wants to accomplish, have power or accumulate possessions. There is no end to this fear, both on a personal and societal level. The idea of surrender to a less conscious, soulful part of us stirs up these very fears while at the same time offering a new paradigm of being that by passes all these fears.
The promise of soulful surrender makes available gifts that allow for the fullest expression of who we are as spirit beings in a human body. Surrender means living in attunement with a divine Source and the opportunity to co-create and live out the qualities of Spirit that channel through us.
Surrender nurtures a sense of harmony and connection to others. We find that discernment, wisdom and deep knowing begin to replace judgement and criticism. Fear itself is replaced by deep, abiding faith that everything is proceeding according to Divine plan. A natural compassion and deep willingness to alleviate suffering replaces the need for power and striving. Competition is replaced by cooperation,fair play and forgiveness. There is a new sense of knowing your own truth and an ability to express your truth without fear. As you give up the illusion of separateness, you develop deeper emotional intimacy in the awareness of the unity of all beings and a new and deep sense of belonging. A sense of contentment with what is and living in the Now replaces fear for the future.